Connection to Love

Jennifer Johnson

In 2015, I wrote a blog about choosing to be happy in the midst of my grief. Little did I know how much of a struggle that would be and the healing process that I had to go through since my husband, Todd, died.  It’s still very much true today as it was then.

CONNECTION is my word for 2018… and what that means to me is to CONNECT with what makes me happy. For myself, it is being grounded in nature (as I enjoy the sunset with bare feet in the grass in this pic) but more so, community. This is where my inner being comes alive!

I had two choices when Todd died… I could curl up in a corner because my love was gone and my entire existence as I knew it was over, or I could fight every single day for what I knew I was worthy of, which for me, is just simply being happy. Todd left an incredible legacy of being happy and fulfilled. I choose to stop at nothing in order to do the same. I shouldn’t feel guilty for being happy. Allowing myself to be happy is how I can love myself enough to keep Todd’s legacy alive.

 

The fact is that we are all dealt a few crappy hands throughout our lives. We will face tough times. Things won’t always go our way. Something or someone will disappoint us. Our hearts will be broken at least once, if not many times. The hardships we’re dealt may be unimaginable. They may be completely out of our control. And we will certainly feel at some point as we’ve been led to rock bottom and there is no way that we can bounce back.

While we can’t always control the challenging times, each of us has the ability to choose how we react to them. We can allow them to define us and take us down OR to see the gifts in them that can help us to grow into an improved version of ourselves. We can decide that we might as well just give up and live our days wallowing in despair because of what fate handed us, or we can decide to keep going and fight for what we know we are worthy of, despite it.

I know that we all want better for ourselves. It’s a tough road letting go of disappointment, sadness, despair, etc. and reminding ourselves that we can and will have better. I know this firsthand. But I also know that it’s achievable by making conscious choices towards better every single day.

I’ve made many, many choices over the last couple of years that I really, REALLY didn’t want to make but there are a few that I have made willingly that have truly made a difference in my ability to function, be strong, move forward, and be happy.

  • Choose to be grateful. Express your gratitude often for simply being alive and for the good things/people in your life. Gratitude is truly where happiness begins.
  • Choose to have an open heart. It may feel broken right now but the quickest way to healing is allowing joy and love in.
  • Choose to release all that does not serve you. If it doesn’t aid in your growth and happiness, let it go, regardless of what it is.
  • Choose to allow your circumstances to pave the way to the beautiful place you are destined to be. It does not define you.
  • Choose to get out of your comfort zone. Do something you haven’t done before…or something you’ve always wanted to. Put yourself in situations in which you can make new connections and have fulfilling experiences.
  • Choose to live without fear. Fear builds walls that keep us from having all that we desire and deserve.
  • CHOOSE LIFE. Don’t allow yourself to live in darkness. Don’t be like all the others who choose to wallow and are merely existing. Stand up, get out of the corner, turn on the lights, and start making the best life possible for yourself.

CHOOSE to connect.

Whether it is with friends, family, spiritual family, networking groups, or your widow sister community…. be open to connecting with like-minded, supportive, encouraging people who lift you up and empower you to continuously move forward.